Self Care

I'm sitting in a local coffee shop, catching up on Carter's baby journal. It's been a while, because quite frankly, Mom life just doesn't slow down and the only time I seem to be able to actually journal about my precious children is when they are absent because that means there is peace and quiet.

I just did the social media thing. I took a picture of my coffee, scone, and journal and posted with #SelfCare. Interestingly enough, the spine of my journal says, "Choose Happiness" - I love this gentle reminder that sometimes happiness is a choice, sometimes it's something we have to make room for. Sometimes happiness comes through self care and we simply have to create room in our lives to do that.

One year ago today, we were wrapping up what turned out to be a very traumatic first year of Carter's life. 2 surgeries, 2 rounds of croup, 3 hospital stays, and 1 very serious illness that I later found out could have been life threatening and this Mommy was depleted. I had spent every ounce of my energy on my children, my home, sadly not much on my husband, and nothing on me.

Thankfully through some very wise counsel of a few seasoned Moms, the support of a very loving husband, and a dear friend who decided to invest in my personal physical health, one year later my heart, mind and body have done a 180!

Every Sunday, I attend church with my family, then while my husband carries on to teach middle school boys, I get to sneak off, grab coffee and journal. Sometimes I grab post church brunch with a girlfriend or even just roam Target blissfully alone. I don't even have to buy anything, just the fact that I can look longer than 5 seconds at something without children yanking clothes off hangers, yelling, or running away is simply life giving. You know what I'm talking about. This doesn't come without sacrifice from my husband. That means he juggles Waumba Land pick up alone. He has to beat it across our very large church campus and try to get to not one but two classes "on time" so he isn't holding up the volunteers who are ready to go home. He then has to wrangle to very energetic kids out of the building and into the car. He's told me pick up is often the most stressful 15 min of his whole week. I don't take that for granted and I'm grateful he selflessly takes this on so that I can have a bit of me time.

Last summer, my post baby X2 babies body, was sadly out of shape and clinging to those last pesky 10 lbs of baby weight. Friends, it doesn't matter if you have 10 lbs or 50 lbs hanging on, you're unhappy and don't feel like your most beautiful you. It's just a fact of womanhood. Thank God for my friend Teri, fitness Queen! In a passing comment on her FB page to work out in her home gym, she texted me and said, "I'm in!" You guys, she has blessed my world beyond measure. She took me under her wing, coaches me three times a week, helped me overhaul my diet, and keeps me accountable. I've lost all my baby weight, got myself back into my pre baby clothes, and I'm the strongest and healthiest I've been in years. Seriously, I can lawnmower pull a 30 lb weight up over my head now. I started at 8 lbs and it was a struggle! (Say what?!?) Not only that, but Teri and I are on similar journeys in motherhood and we've had a lot of bonding time as we talk about our babies, our hopes and dreams for their futures, and our own heartbreak at their struggles. What started off as a workout buddy has turned into a beautiful relationship. I'm eternally grateful.

I joined my neighborhood book club. It's full of wonderful women from all ages, stages and walks of life. They are simply a blast and fill my soul each time we gather. That has helped me feel very connected to our neighbors and makes the community that I live in 24/7 truly feel like part of my village.

We took a family vacation followed by a "JUST US" vacation and it filled my cup to overflowing. We needed to be unplugged from the world and tuned into each other. My husband and I re-purposed to create time, space and budget for regular date nights. It doesn't always happen, but it's a regular goal, which means it's happening more often than not.

Last, but never least, I have a Mommy mentor. She's amazing. We meet every couple of months for coffee and conversations. She's full of wisdom and has poured so much I to my life. She helps me be a better wife and Mom and I am grateful.

So, friends. Two words. Self care. If you don't take care of you, you can't take care of others. It's more than a hashtag on a coffee shop picture. It is simply life giving. Do it.